{scared}

*I’m finding it harder and harder to blog these days. First, finding time when there are already not enough hours in the day is hard, especially since I’m in bed almost right after Xander because I am SO tired. And even though I have lots of thoughts rolling around in my head, when I do find the occasional spare minute to sit down and write, nothing comes out, or at least not the way I want it to.*

Today marks 193 days until I do one of the craziest things that I will probably ever do in my life. In October 2012 I ran my first ever official 5k run. It was shortly after that race that my best friend, Victoria (whom I talk about on here often), decided to start running and we set out to run in a race every month for a year. We did pretty good with our goal! It was also shortly after my first 5k that I thought maybe one day I’d like to run a half marathon and set out to train for that. In April 2013 I completed my first ever half marathon and crushed my goal by about 10 minutes! I couldn’t believe it. It was after that half marathon that my hubby told me that I should run a marathon now. I gave him the evil eye and said NEVER! I had no ambition to run a marathon what so ever. I liked the 13.1 distance just enough to possibly consider another half marathon… possibly.

In late summer 2013 I found out I was pregnant and my gumption for another half marathon anytime soon dwindled away, but I had hopes of doing another one at some point. Then Victoria found the Dopey Challenge (of which I’ve blogged about before) and we knew that there was no turning back. We are officially crazy, but yes, we’ve always been this way together! Um, seriously, who else would I join forces with and wear a picture of some random guy I found in a magazine taped to my shirt every Friday while in high school. Hello, HOT GUY FRIDAY was a must, haha!

So, in 193 days the Walt Disney World Marathon weekend begins and I cannot wait! I am scared shitless about the prospect of running my first ever marathon the day after completing a half marathon, which is the day after running a 10k, which is the day after running a 5k. I am not scared about the 5k or the 10k or even the first half of the half marathon. I KNOW I will be able to complete those because I have before. And honestly, my only goal for the marathon is to finish it. I do not have plans to run the entire thing. I just want to FINISH! But seriously, 26.2 miles is daunting. Especially since at this point, almost one full month into training, my further distance has only been a 5k. I blame part of that on the 1 ½ week break I had to take because of a stomach virus that I had that caused anything I ate to literally go right through me which halted any running or working out for a bit. Ugh!

I am making progress though, that much I know. On May 26^th I participated in my first 5k post baby that I was planning on running in and finished it in just under 45 minutes. On June 26^th (last night) I ran a 5k in just under 37 minutes! Progress (not perfection)! Very proud of myself. Further, from May 1 until today I have lost 6.9% of my body weight! Hells yeah, I am officially back down to pre-baby weight! I still have some toning that I need to do, especially with my abs (darn you stomach muscles), but I am feeling SO much better (and most of my clothes fit again)!

I donned a swimsuit for the first time this past week in almost a year and went swimming with Ayden. It was great! Okay, so I still may not love my body in a swimsuit, but we had a lot of fun in the pool and I remembered my love of swimming! It is such a good workout and very relaxing at the same time. Yes, I just said that a workout can be relaxing, haha!

This week also ends my first month back at work and it has gone well. I’ve survived, the kids have survived, my house has survived, the hubs has survived. It’s all good (most of the time). My biggest problem is feeling like there are enough hours in the day, although I know that a lot of people struggle with this. Also, I don’t know why I didn’t realize this before now, but Jay gets to spend more time with the kids than I do and I am slightly jealous of that fact. I do get the awake time with them in the morning while we are all getting ready for the day so it kind of evens out on the days that Jay doesn’t get home until 3ish, but still. This momma likes her kiddo time, hehe! Anyways, it works for us and Jay is a great hands on father. I mean, I already knew that with Ayden, but he wasn’t around 24/7 when Ayden was a baby simply because we didn’t live together that first year. That doesn’t mean he wasn’t around at all or that he didn’t help, but I was without help most nights after 7pm. Granted, typically when I get home I take on baby duty since Jay has already been home for a few hours and because I’m kind of craving it, but it does help to also have him around when I do need a break. For example, like last night when Xander got up at 2am and this momma was tired… daddy took that feeding. Generally I do most night feedings, with Jay doing one (sometimes two) during a week and that is okay with me because he doesn’t complain.

I refuse to believe that next week we start July. The summer is already flying by and it seems like it has just started. Ugh!

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{keep going}

I have been back at work for one full week now and I am starting week number two and I am still alive and functioning. Still alive and well, and well managing to still function somehow, haha! The drive in this morning was rough. Have I mentioned that I have a 45 minute drive to and from work? It gets long when you are tired! Thank goodness for my energy drink that I’ve been having! No more soda, almost two months soda free!

How was leaving Xander and returning to work you ask?! What, you didn’t ask? Well, I’m going to tell you anyways. It was alright. No tears were shed. I survived. It was a little rough. I got up that morning and managed to get everyone ready in time and was off to work. I am officially part of the 5am club, but just not for working out. Wish it could be for that. Maybe in a few weeks once I feel more confident about being able to get ready and out the door on time I’ll work that in. I had a really good week being back at work and besides missing the tiny man like crazy, it went well. I was pretty busy all week so the days just flew by and before I knew it, I was headed back home to cuddle with the Xan-man! I think in the ideal world I’d love to work only part-time (as I really did enjoy that last summer), but student loans and other bills kind of prevent that right now. Oh well. It really isn’t as if I am going to ‘work’ because I do like what I do. It doesn’t seem like work for me. Are all days peachy perfect? Of course not, but for the most part it doesn’t feel like work per se. If that makes sense.

I forgot to mention in my last post that I’ve officially run my first (and now second) 5k since Xander was born. On Memorial Day weekend, Victoria (because we hardly ever do runs without each other anymore), Ayden, Xander, and myself all packed up and headed off to Fond Du Lac for my first post baby run. I don’t necessarily count the Color Run I did three weeks after Xander was born because I walked the whole thing. We had (mostly me) big goals of finishing this run in less than 45 minutes. It was no easy feat, let me tell you. I was pushing the jogging stroller, and have you ever tried running with one of those?!

Needless to say, Ayden rocked the run and actually ended up finishing about three minutes before me. We all stuck together until about the last half mile-ish. I pushed myself and Victoria throughout the whole thing. Ask her, I was being the bitchy bestie who wouldn’t let her walk! Hehe! We did walk/run intervals and Ayden had no trouble at all! Little stink butt! Xander slept the whole time so we didn’t even get cheered on by him, haha! I came in shortly after 44 minutes and Victoria finished just before 45 minutes. We all hit our goal and were damn proud of ourselves. I mean, at that point I was just shy of six weeks post-partum. Hells yeah!

That run took care of our May ‘obligation’ so it was then time to find one for June and I happened to find one in a city pretty close to us. It was an uber small event with maybe 100 walkers (if that) and probably only about 20 runners. This time I was sans kiddos and my goal was to finish in less than 40 minutes and Victoria’s was to finish in less than 44 and wouldn’t you know it… we both hit our goals again! Rock it! The course ended up being more like 3.25 miles instead of 3.1, but I checked my Garmin at 3.1 and I was at 37 minutes and about 30 seconds. Oh yeah! I felt good! It was a hard run because I was pushing myself, but you don’t get better by just sitting around not pushing yourself! And I know that I’ll get back to where I was at some point!

Victoria and I have now officially run in 11 ‘races’ together. I use the term race loosely as we don’t actually race, we just run. And I’ve also discovered that we have a knack for always standing on the same side when we take our after run picture together. Too funny! Never would I have thought that by starting out running to just finish a 5k back in October 2012 that I would have somehow become addicted to it, gotten my best friend addicted to it, and be training for my first marathon! It is completely insane if you ask me! But that is what Victoria and I do best… we do insane and I don’t think either of us would have it any other way!

CIAO! LOVE ME!