{a few more weeks, or what seems like eternity at least to me}

I think I've officially entered into the third trimester state of miserableness. Most of my positivity has gone, and I like to generally think that I am a positive person. I've turned into a bitter negative Nancy. Okay, so it is not THAT horrible... I mean, I am having some good moments here and there. I have to say that overall things continue to progress as they should for the pregnancy with no complications or anything and everything that I am feeling at this point is totally normal, but I'm sure whining a lot (at least in my head and today on the blog). I was officially 34 weeks pregnant yesterday and man has it been a long 34 weeks so far. Well, I lie... the first six weeks were pretty awesome because I was still feeling normal and like myself and had a little secret and then when morning sickness hit... well, let's just say I've been waiting for baby to arrive since that point in time, haha!

I sit and think, wow, baby can potentially come anytime in the next three to six weeks and that really isn't all that much time. In all honesty, he could come at ANY time, but thus far I haven't had any signs of going into labor anytime soon. Granted, we're probably looking closer to the six week mark, but still. Six weeks is going to fly by (for most people)... At this point, time is pretty much standing still for me. Although, another work week has come and gone and I'm down to about a month of work left. I had my worst night of sleep so far in this pregnancy the other night. Or it should be considered lack of sleep. I ended up in bed around my normal time, which these days is 7:00pm and ended up sleeping pretty peacefully until about 10:00pm when Jay came to bed. I woke up and used the bathroom (per usual) and ended up back in bed wide awake with the worst reflux ever until about 2:00am. I could not get comfortable no matter what I tried and at this point I was using my pregnancy pillow (huge U-shaped pillow), three regular pillows under my head, and my straight body pillow under half of my back. I pulled out my phone and read for a while trying to make myself tired, tried to stave off tears of frustration as my legs were killing me as well, and just wanted to punch Jay because he was sleeping peacefully next to me and I didn't think that he should be, haha! I didn't actually punch him, but for a few minutes I wanted him to feel some of the miserableness I was feeling. I think it might be time to switch from the Tums that I have been relying on for heartburn and reflux to the Zantac that my doctor has mentioned during the last couple of appointments. Apparently even more than two Tums per day can increase your chances of having constipation. Not that you cared to know that. I'm taking four per day and well, haven't had any problems with that so far. Haha, once again, not that you cared to know that. See, I still have some humor in me. 

Feelings overall. I just overall don't feel good anymore. I know that it is par for the course these days as my body continues to grow the tiny man, but as I've said so many times in the past, it's not like I have to enjoy it. Feel grateful for it, yes, but enjoy it, not so much. I don't know how much bigger my stomach can get as I feel like I've already grown out of room. Most days I feel like I cannot breath deeply... please tiny man, drop soon, haha! 

Weight. I've stopped looking at the scale weeks, probably months ago, as I know that at this point I've gained more than I've wanted to this pregnancy; however, my doctor continues to report that weight gain looks good. I know that when I stepped on it the last time at home I was surprised by the number, but not mad about it. I accepted it. And seriously, I can still see some of my upper ribs, so really, I'm mostly baby and larger rear and thighs, hehe! When I look in the mirror I just see big. I don't see cute belly anymore. Instead my focus is on my ever expanding thighs and rear end region, as well as my noticeable decrease in bicep muscles. I have to admit that I was pretty proud of my arms pre pregnancy. Working out during pregnancy, whoever thought that that was a good idea?! Haha! If only! I'm at the point where I don't care about the number on the scale. It is going to continue to rise until baby comes, I've accepted that.

Stretch marks. Not even my concern anymore. Actually, they weren't really a concern in the first place. I had them prior to getting pregnant, so I knew they'd just darken up during the pregnancy and that there was a good chance I'd get more during pregnancy. I didn't mind them before. I had them prior to getting pregnant. I don't know if I've gotten anymore... I cannot see and I refuse to try and see in a mirror, lol! They won't ever go away. I was fine with them post Ayden... didn't stop me from wearing a bikini, won't stop me this time around. 

Baby movements. Still enjoying them most of the time, but becoming increasingly uncomfortable. Glad to know that he is still moving and grooving around in there though. Wouldn't change that for the world and it is definitely happening almost all day long. I swear that he knows when I am sitting down in the car on my drive to and from work because he tends to go crazy during those times. Makes driving slightly more uncomfortable than it was in the past. 

Work. It's going as well as can be expected at this point. I still enjoy seeing my patients and going to work each day definitely makes the days and weeks go faster than sitting at home because I am out doing something. I look forward to the weekends because it is two days off, but even then I'm not comfortable. I do have a 'nesting' list of things that I'd like to get done at home and would probably be more productive at if I had some extra time off, but there are still a few weekends that Jay and I can work together at getting things done. I don't particularly enjoy getting up in the morning and having to come to work. I'd much rather just sit at home and sleep all day, but we need the money. Darn those student loans! At this point, my last day of work will be April 10th. That is 23 more days... well actually it is 24, but I have one day off in there, and if we are being technical here, it is actually less than 23 because I have a few half days off due to weekly routine doctor appointments that were pre-scheduled before I started fulltime. In the grand scheme of things, it is not a lot of days left, but sometimes it feels like they could go on forever. And this is all pending I am still pregnant that long. (So far all signs point to yes, I will be.)

Pelvic pressure. Baby seems to have semi dropped in the last day or so. I am definitely feeling more pressure down under when I am up and walking around and it is not comfortable. Waddle much?! Is anything comfortable at this point? I'm kind of hoping that as he descends lower, I'll be able to breath easier and the heartburn and/or reflux won't be as bad, but so far, either he's not low enough yet or I'm just so small that he takes up all of the space no matter what. All I know is that the Tums I'm taking after lunch and supper just aren't cutting it as much anymore. And to make matters worse, I can barely cross my legs anymore and I certainly can't do it without having to pull one over the other. Someone knock me out and wake me up when it's time to have this baby.

Congestion. My nose is constantly plugged up at this point, except for about an hour or so after my shower. I'm a nose breather. It sucks. Especially since when I try and blow it, I'm also trying not to pee myself and nothing actually comes out of my nose. I know, so funny, haha! I've worn a breathe right strip on my nose to bed consistently for the last several weeks and it seems to help until about 2 or 3 in the morning when it starts to peel off. Only problem with that is that it is something adhesive stuck to my skin for hours on end every night, which means my nose is often red and dry looking these days when I'm not wearing any makeup. Just recently I found a different device at the store that you put up in your nose to help with congestion and it does help, once again, until about 2 or 3 in the morning, but it isn't exactly the most comfortable thing to wear. I suppose it just takes some getting used to.

The lists of negatives can go on and on. I can find just about anything to complain about these days. But all in all, I know that we are nearing the end, baby needs to cook for just a little bit longer, and as much as I haven't necessarily enjoyed being pregnant, the end result is SO worth all of the discomforts I have been experiencing and because we don't know if this will be our last baby or not, I am (as much as it may not seem like it in my blog posts) trying to enjoy some of it, even if that some is mostly just the baby moving around inside of me, or having the hubs cook me supper more often, or having my little man be a little more caring (because at 9 1/2 he sometimes thinks he's too big to cuddle with his mama). Sidenote, you should have seen us on the couch last night. I was propped up with pillows, Ayden was cuddling next to me with a big blanket and Drake, the one who continues to think he's a lap dog comes right on over and tries to snuggle up in my non occupied arm half on my belly. It was a sight and I loved it!

CIAO! LOVE ME!