{i wish it was time}

I'm sure I have shared (more than once) that we are 90% sure we are moving in the late Spring. We have to let our landlords know by the end of Februrary whether or not we are going to renew our lease and the answer to that is a 99% sure resounding no. That means I am already in moving mode. Because I know that an impending move is on the horizon (okay, so still eight months away), my love for our current house is waning. I can't help but imagine what our new place is going to be like. I can't help but hope that it will be a teeny bit better than our current place... I just can't help it. I've tried not to get sucked down into wish land where our next place will be perfect, but it's too hard. The reality is that we may end up back in a large apartment building in an apartment that is half the size of where we live now and honestly that makes me cringe. I LOVE our current house with it's upstairs and (semi) finished basement. I espeically love the fact that we can have a playroom and that the majority of Ayden's toys stay there. I LOVE that we have an office area. I LOVE that we have one and a half bathrooms. I am not in love with the smaller type bedrooms and closests that accompany them (although we do have an amazing linen closet and two rather large coat closests in the living room). I do NOT love the kitchen. My least favorite place in the house is the kitchen. I could go for a larger living room as well, but this house as served us well and I would hate to 'move backwards' when all I want is to move forwards in life.

I feel like I am at such a stagnant place right now just wishing the next eight months away so we can move, I can start my externship, we can be settled again, Jay can have a new job, and all of the other impending stuff that comes with a move can be done and over with. I can feel it all just looming over me ready to get dumped onto my shoulders at any second and that thought literally terrifies me. Our other moves were because we wanted to move. We decided that it was time and we really weren't moving all that far (other than when we first moved up to Point). Moving across town once and then again didn't mean Ayden had to change daycares or docotors or dentists or banks or learning new roads or finding new babysitters or even friends. It just meant a change of scenery and a new address. This time; however, it is going to be different. When we moved up to Point I had just turned 19... I was young and niave (yes I will admit it), but I wanted out on my own and wanted to experience life with Jay and Ayden as our own little family. We've made it work since then and have gotten into a nice little groove. Now that we are older (and maybe slightly more mature, hehe), I think we are ready for the next phase in our lives to start. Okay, so I don't know about Jay, but I do know that I sure am ready for it... it just doesn't seem to becoming fast enough. And this time I'm not talking about babies, although they are never far from my mind. As much as it pains me to write this, no babies for us until after the wedding. And although most people would think that that is the only logical option, we all know I would love to have another baby tomorrow. But don't discount a baby within nine months of the wedding, hehe! You'd better believe it!

And I know that I am not the only one feeling this way. My classmate (and friend), Katie, and I were having this very same discussion just to today. We are both getting married shortly after graduating (her at the end of June) and we are both going to be moving at the end of this academic year. Neither of us have any ambition to do anything school related and just want to be out in the real world. We've been in school for FAR too long. Really, when I think about it, I did 12 years of education (plus kindergarten) before graduating with my high school diploma. I will have done nine more years of education just to get out and work. Typically it is only eight years, but I took an extra year to get my bachelors, which isn't bad considering having a kid just out of high school. And believe me, this will not be the last time you hear me talk about this, ha! It's going to be a LONG eight months my readers... please bear with me as I continue forward with life and find out what surprises and excitement wait for my family and me!

I cannot remember if I shared my frustration with you when it comes to helping my wonderful son learn to read. At this point I know that he is behind where he should be in comparison with his classmates when it comes to reading and writing. I think I was in denial about it for a while. Jay and I had expressed our concerns with his first grade teacher a few time throughout the year last year and she continued to tell us that he was on pace with the majority of his class and that she did not see any major concerns. I think I was complacent with her response and didn't worry or push the subject like I probably should have. We occasionally read at home, but we did not push it like we should have. I love to read and can only hope that Ayden will enjoy books as much as I do someday, but at this point, I'm just hoping he makes it through second grade. We are about a month into second grade now and about two weeks ago my concerns about Ayden's reading really started to hit again. I realized that over the summer I was (yes, I am admitting it) lazy when it came to reading with Ayden. I did not put forth the effort that I know I should have. I kept thinking he was going to be okay. For him, that was not the case. He struggles in reading, struggles to the point where I started actively seeking out a tutor for him for the extra help.

Ayden and I had a very bad experience trying to read last week and I felt like the worst mother in the world afterwards and it hit me that maybe the best person to help teach him reading was not me. We did not click together for this subject. Jay had much more patience than me and took over the task of helping Ayden with reading. I did my part and started researching Slyvan learning center because my friend had a very good experience with them and her son. I wasn't looking forward to having to pay the price for tutoring, but I was willing to. And then... a note came home from school saying that Ayden was going to be receving Title 1 services at school for reading... extra one on one help everyday for reading and I don't have to pay for it! Now Ayden receives speech and language services and reading help. Despite the fact that he is being pulled out of the classroom twice a week for 20-30 minutes for speech and what I think is everyday for probably a half hour or so for reading, I am happy. And I will not be so complacent in the future when I know something further can be done. I am the parent and I know best, or maybe I should say, Jay and I are the parents and we know best! Also, I have tried working with Ayden a little bit more with reading and trying to just be super patient and it is starting to pay off. Ayden and I have been working together and it is going well. It's a learning process for both of us and I'm praying we continue on the right path.

Other than wanting to move and making changes when it comes to Ayden's reading life has been going pretty well!

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{it's that time again}

Time for another anniversary post! This will be the fourth anniversary post that I have written for my blog about Jay and I being together. I went back to look at other ones and I cannot believe that I have been blogging for as long as I have been. I blogged about being together for five years, six years, seven years, and now EIGHT years! (Note: our actual eight year anniversary was yesterday, I just didn’t have enough time to blog about it then.) Not only does that mean I have been blogging for a long time (almost three and a half years already!), but that means Jay and I have been together for an even longer time... EIGHT years today! Eight years... sometimes when I say it I cannot even fathom that we have been together for that long.I ‘borrowed’ the following from a friend…

I don't pretend to know what love is for everyone, but I can tell you what it is for me… love is knowing all about someone, and still wanting to be with them more than any other person. Love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself, including the things you might be ashamed of. Love is feeling comfortable and safe with someone, but still getting weak knees when they walk into a room and smile at you.

For me… love is being with Jay… now and forever!

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{it’s a bird, it’s a plane}

Actually, it’s a BEAD! And it was stuck in Ayden’s ear and because the ENT doctor was unable to extrude it during an office visit, Ayden needed to be put to sleep to get it out. The doctor attempted to get it out in office and was able to make some head way; however, it was painful for Ayden and after the first attempt, he would not let the doctor anywhere near his ear despite my best attempts at trying to calm him down. The next best option was to schedule an appointment where Ayden would be put to sleep and the bead would be extracted the rest of the way. Said appointment was scheduled for this morning, bright and early. We had to be at the hospital by 6:45am. UGH! SO early! But it was kind of nice because Ayden was not allowed to eat or drink anything from midnight beforehand and it meant he wouldn’t have to be hungry for very long.

I let Ayden sleep in until about 10-15 minutes before we had to leave. He complained about not feeling very good before we left, but I knew it was because he was hungry and that he was nervous.We had gone to Walmart the night before and I let Ayden pick out a prize for after the procedure. He picked out a lego sticker book and was told that he could have it after we got home from the hospital if he did a good job. My main concern was him whining and being a typical seven year old and not wanting it done because we had some angst about it earlier in the week. Yes, I bribed my child… and it worked.The hospital and the staff was super nice. They let Ayden bring in his favorite blanket and/or stuffed animal as a comfort item and he even got to take it to the procedure room with him (although his procedure was pretty uninvolved). I do have to say though that this isn’t his favorite blanket… he didn’t want to bring ‘bibi’ because he didn’t want it to get dirty. He was such a brave boy. He answered all of the nurses questions. We did a lot of sitting around and waiting. And lots of angry birds playing as well. I think having my tablet to play was kind of a lifesaver because it helped keep Ayden’s mind off of what was coming.The type of anesthesia that he was under was considered general, but he didn’t need to get poked with any needles or anything. They simply put a mask over his nose and mouth and he got to breathe in some strawberry smelling gas and slowly drifted off to sleep. Or so he says because I didn’t actually get to watch. I got to walk with him down to the hallway of all of the surgery rooms and then we had to part, but like I said before, he did SO good. I think he was a little bit afraid, but he didn’t shed any tears and the nurses said that he told them all about his legos and home.Afterwards… which was really only maybe 15 minutes after they took him, most of those minutes taking him to fall asleep and wake up, we had more waiting around to do just to make sure that his vitals were stable and everything was good after the anesthesia. No medications, no restrictions, just a simple extraction procedure and because of all that, a full day home from school!Here is a similar picture of what the bead looked like that was in his ear. I did end up keeping the bead… I mean totally! I am a future audiologist, this was super cool for me! However, I didn’t take a picture of it yet, not that you want to see the actual one that was in his ear because there is some ear wax on it yet and I know that anyone who is not an audiologist probably thinks ear wax is pretty gross.I have no idea how long the bead was in his ear or how it even ended up in his ear, but I am glad that it is now out. Oh the joys of having children and the things they do, hehe!

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{exhausted}

I am just plain tired today. I thought getting up early to workout was supposed to wake you up?! It's definitely made me more tired today, but it has been a long week and I know that I am not getting enough sleep. Naughty me. I've been going to bed too late and then having to get up too early. That combination does not work good together. And I won't get to sleep in at all this weekend. Bummer. That's what five hour energy is for, right?! Ha!
I've had a really good first week at my clinical rotation and I am excited about the rest of the semester. My supervisor said that she was going to try and get me into to see a cochlear implant surgery in the coming weeks and then get to see the testing afterwards. I would totally LOVE that! I think that it would be uber cool! Wait, more than uberly cool, like mega uber cool! On Tuesday I got to see how they program a cochlear implant; however, it was just the device. It was a replacement device for a patient who already has one and so I just got to see the software and such and not the patient, but I'm hoping to get to see some patients with implants this semester. I think it's definitely going to be a good placement for me! Lots of variety and interesting cases! All what I haven't really had a chance to see yet.

My classes are continuing to go well. Albeit, it is only the second week. I need to get all of the due dates written down in my calendar so I know when things are due because we do have a fair amount of homework this semester despite only having three classes. It isn't an overload by any means, but I don't want to get behind or miss any due dates. I am pretty anal about getting things done on time, well actually before they end up being due. It's part of my type A personality.

I feel like lately Jay and I have been more cohabitating and co-parenting then actually being together. I'm sure a part of that has to deal with the fact that we are home less together now as well since the semester has started. I don't get home until 6ish on Tuesday nights and 7ish on Wednesday nights and then we eat, I work out, and by the time that is all done and over with all I want to do at the end of those days is just relax and watch some TV before going to bed. I know that we need to make more of an effort to spend more time together, but it just never happens. He's playing his stupid games downstairs and I'm upstairs watching TV, doing school stuff, or on my computer. It's a struggle. Something else that I need to learn how to prioritize a little better is making the time I do get to spend with Ayden a little more special. As with Jay, when I get home later at night now, we don't get to see each other too much before he has to go to bed. I know that it is a struggle that every working parent faces so I know that I am not alone. I need to learn to work with my guilt and make the time that we do get to spend together more meaningful. And I try, I do try. It's a learning process and I wax and wane at it at different times.

One thing I didn't realize until last night was how much when Jay and I fight affects Ayden. Jay and I don't fight often, we try not to raise our voices at each other, but it does happen sometimes. Well, last night Jay and I were in the bathroom together getting stuff ready for this weekend talking animatedly about something (I cannot remember right now what it was), but we were not arguing or fighting and Ayden pops his head in and asks if we could go just one day without fighting. It was a little humorous, but it also made me realize that he thinks we fight or argue a lot and that makes me sad. That is not the impression that I want him to grow up with.

My parent's got divorced when I was in the 5th or 6th grade, so I wasn't much older than Ayden is now. Actually, he is probably the age my brother was when my parents got divorced. I don't remember much of when my parents were still together, so I can imagine that my brother remembers even less. But one thing I have to say is that I don't remember ever seeing them having a full blown arguement in front of us children. Now maybe they did and because I was younger I don't remember it. But I do remember my mom and her current husband arguing. Having full blown screaming matches at each other and I know that I hated it so I can imagine how much Ayden does not like seeing Jay and I argue. It's definitely an eye opener, that's for sure.

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{maurices is my friend}

Best part of this week so far... I went to the store Maurices today to look for a new pair of low heels for clinic and ended up trying on some dress pants and I ended up having to get a size 3/4 in the pants so that they would fit properly AND the size 3/4 was still a little bit loose. Yes, I know I am gloating, but come on people, I have NEVER been a size 3/4! Probably not since I was like 12 or 13 and maybe not even then! This working out thing is AWESOME! And, the scale read 115.0 yesterday! HA! Made my goal! SO happy and excited (even though I'm sure you are sick to death reading about my working out and weight loss). My blog, if you don't like it, don't read it. But keeping it realistic, the majority of my pants are still size 7... I put on a pair of size 7 jeans this morning and they fit perfectly. Not too tight or too loose, I can deal with size 7 pants. Besides, every different brand of pants has a little bit different sizing so really, being in a size 3/4 isn't that big of a deal because some of my pants are still a size 9 (albeit they are a little looser than they used to be).

I ended up finding a cute pair of shorter heels, two pair of dress pants, and two dress shirts that were on sale. Maurices tends to get me in trouble, hehe, its just as bad as Kohls, although I don't go there quite as often. I could have spent a lot more there, but I was trying to rein it in. And, I had lost my 20% off coupon for Kohls so I couldn't go there as well. I did have a coupon for Maurices and ended up saving almost $50 so that's good.

I had my first day of off campus clinic for this semester yesterday and it went really well. I think that I am really going to like it. My supervisor seems really cool and everyone there is really friendly too which is always really nice. I even got to see a couple of really cool cases on my first day which is probably the best part. Tomorrow Jay and I get to carpool together to work. Aw, so much fun, right?! But it is going to save us on gas money for at least one day a week so that is good! Anything that saves money is good!

We had Ayden's first cub scout meeting of the year yesterday and it went well. We get to the lovely job of selling popcorn again this year. They even let us taste test some of it this time and I fell in love with the Mud Puddles! I am not a big popcorn lover, but popcorn covered in chocolate, yum! We are definitely getting that kind, and probably two more kinds. I am kind of bummed that this will probably be Ayden's last year of cub scouts with this Pack. We decided that if we have to move away that we are definitely going to look into getting him into cub scouts wherever we end up, he likes it too much not to. Also, we are going to do all of the summer activities too with his current pack. They are going to spend the night at the Mall of America sleeping in the shark tube aquarium! Last year they slept with the Dinosaurs at the museum down in Chicago and we couldn't go because of a schedule conflict. Ayden is excited to go this year as he has become really close with all of his den members (and I've grown to love the leader and his family, they are great).

Today is my late night class. Being back in class is kind of weird. Seeing the campus full of students again is kind of weird. I need to write down all of the due dates that I need to remember before they start creeping up on me as they are bound to do. I don't really like getting home at 7pm at night... it means eating late and working out even later. I should have gotten up earlier this morning to workout. I even had my alarm set to get up, but when it went off, I reset it for an hour later. I was just too tired after a early and long day on Tuesday. So, I will end up working out later tonight. I picked up two new dvds yesterday to try. As I think I stated previously, the two P90X ones weren't really my favorite. I got a Biggest Loser one and a Tae-Bo one. I'm debating which one I want to try out tonight. I skipped working out last night since I got home, ate supper, and then we left for Ayden's meeting and didn't get back home until almost 8:00pm and by then I was just SO not in the mood to workout. Everyone has those kind of days, right?! Hope so!

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{made it}

There has been kind of a lull around here lately. Nothing overly exciting going on, making finding an interesting blog topic that much harder. Although, I think it's pushing it saying that all of my blog posts are interesting, or even the majority of them. But when our days are mundane and all similiar, my want to blog is next to nil.

Last week I had an appointment with one of my professors regarding my research project, off campus clinic in the Spring, and my externship. Overall, the meeting went really well. I am able to start mailing out my surveys, I think I know where I will be for clinic in the Spring, and the possible externship sites over in eastern Wisconsin better be multiple or I might cry. I am pretty much set on us finding an apartment/duplex/house to rent in the Chilton area and sending Ayden to that school district. But we all know, even the best laid plans often do not go as planned.

This past weekend we went home because Jay wanted to do some goose hunting and I just didn't feel like sitting home all weekend with Ayden. Jay didn't get any hunting done, but we did spend a majority of the weekend out on the boat because the weather was so nice and the lake was relatively calm. Okay, so it was nice and calm Saturday night, like glass almost, and on Sunday it was kind of wavy, but not too bad. It was a little rough heading out to where we wanted to fish, but once we got the boat anchored and situated, I felt a lot more comfortable. We caught a decent amount of fish both days. It was fun. I just like being out on the boat and the best part is that I get to go out on it both days this weekend as well because we are going hook and line sturgeon fishing in the Dells. I cannot wait! I think this is the third year that we will be going to the Dells to go and so far the weather looks like it should cooperate.

After being going this weekend and not eating all that great, when we got home on Sunday night I was expecting to see a not so good number on the scale, but the number I did see surprised me. What was even better was stepping on tonight and seeing the magic number that I have been waiting for.... 115.8. Like before, let's pretend that the 0.8 isn't actually there and that it is just 115 pounds. SO excited because honestly I didn't think I was going to make my goal weight and now I have without having to really push for it. I've still been working out, it's become a habit now and I've been eating pretty good. Not overly healthy, but not overly dieting either. I definitely enjoy some chocolate here and there!

Okay, don't blame me when you get to the end of this post and realize it really wasn't that interesting either, ha! I start my off campus placement tomorrow and I am excited about that too. The hours don't sound too bad and I should be home by 5:30-6:00pm at the latest. And guess what?! Lady Antebellum's new cd comes out tomorrow. Guess who is definitely going to go buy a copy (along with some body wash and fash wash because we are running low on both of those) tomorrow night! ME!

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{third year}

I know, I know. I said that I was going to blog every day this month and it is only six days in and I have already failed. I am not too good at keeping to my word, am I? Haha! I thought about it last night, I did. I even worked out early in order to watch the show that I wanted to and then still have enough time to blog before it got to late and then I just got lazy. I was tired and didn't have the ambition to blog about the details of our final day of the last weekend of 'summer'. I think you all survived though, correct?!

Today starts my first 'official' day as a THIRD year graduate student! When did I become a third year graduate student?! I remember starting graduate school as a newbie... coming in and thinking that the next four years were going to go SO slow and that I would never make it through! Graduate school is a daunting thought! And here I sit, writing this to you as a third year student. Yes, I will write it again... a third year student. That means that after this year I am out on my externship, one year closer to the real world. One year closer to having my own patients and not being supervised. I am just in awe of it all because a few weeks into last year and I thought that I was never going to make it through! Last year flew by and I am sure that this year will be no different. It's like moving up the ladder in high school and then moving up it again as a undergraduate and now I've almost reached the top for the third time. And then as my friend Katie said today, we start all over in our careers.

I am officially done with beginning of the year AuD orientations. It seems weird to write that. The one today seemed kind of pointless. They didn’t tell me anything I didn’t already know. It was nice to see all of my fellow Madison classmates again though. We only actually see each other (in the flesh) twice a year. It was nice to catch up with everyone, especially since when we see them they are about two inches tall on a TV screen.

I think the only thing that the orientation did today was overwhelm me with all of the stuff that I need to accomplish this coming year. I cringe at the thought of it because it seems like a lot more than I had originally anticipated, but it really isn’t. I was reminded about a super huge test that we have to take at the end of the year… I thought I was done with all standardized tests, but I guess not. Alas, I will not worry about it right now. Can’t get stressed about something that is currently so far away.

I made myself get up early this morning and work out before heading off to work. 6am wake up call! In order to feel more awake, I drank about 3/4 of a 5 hour energy drink. I’m sure you’ve seen it advertised on TV. I read a large amount of reviews about it on Amazon and the majority of them we positive. I honestly don’t know if it gave me the jolt of energy I was looking for. After I drank it, I went and worked out right away and I know that working out helps wake you up as well. It didn’t make me feel jittery or anything and I didn’t have a crash later, but like I said, I don’t know if I got the right effect from it. I have to get up at 5:30am tomorrow in order to make it to my orientation on time and will not have time to work out in the morning so I might take the other one then and see if it helps with the early morning drive.

I think the best part of today was finding out that what I thought was supposed to be a Monday and Wednesday 8am class is really only a Wednesday night class! You cannot imagine my excitement! I don’t even think the sleeping in is the best part, it’s the fact that Ayden doesn’t have to attend before school care those two mornings now. That is going to save us $51 a month! I am elated!!! (And of course now I get to sleep in a little bit as well!)

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{all’s fair at the fair}

After a rough day yesterday between myself and Ayden, myself and Jay, and Jay and Ayden… we all needed to get out and do something fun together. Unfortunately, everyone’s moods this morning were still pretty sour and our Sunday didn’t quite start off as planned.

Jay made everyone a nice big breakfast that was super yummy. Eggs, hash browns, and venison bacon. Just what I needed, a nice fattening breakfast, ha! Right before breakfast was done, Ayden managed to accidently spill an entire glass of chocolate milk in the living room. Yes, we do eat in front of the TV. Our ‘dining’ room really isn’t conducive to sitting down and having meals at. The table is our catch all place and because our kitchen area is so small, it works best to keep the table pushed up against the wall in the corner which means only two available seats. And, eating in the living room works for us. We’ve had plenty of spills before, but for some reason this one this morning just really got to me. Most of the milk ended up on a side table not even hitting the carpet, but that was the last straw. Despite the fact that it was an accident, Ayden is now eating at the kitchen table for the rest of the week. I will re-evaluate the situation at the end of the week. One of our biggest rules about eating in the living room is that we do not watch cartoons while we are eating. Ayden has the tendency to not pay attention to what he is doing then and we end up with more spills.

Thankfully, after breakfast was done, everyone had full stomachs and was in much better moods. We all get ready and headed to Marshfield. The main purpose of the trip was to find the clinic that I will be working at this fall for my off campus audiology rotation, but it just so happened that the Central Wisconsin State Fair was going on in Marshfield at the time as well. I thought it would be a nice family outing.

Due to some current construction, we discovered that my drive to the clinic will take just under an hour. Boo! But thankfully, most of the time I should only have to make that drive once a week. For my other clinic day, my supervisor said that she is usually at the Wisconsin Rapids clinic which means I might even be able to carpool with Jay on Thursdays which would save us at least a little bit of gas. The drive to the clinic was relatively easy so I’m not too worried about that.

After finding the clinic, we wound our way around town until we ended up at the fair. Well, actually, we just followed the GPS. It wasn’t that hard.

We did all of the normal fair things, except for ride any rides. I had sort of wanted to ride a few rides with Ayden, but they were expensive and it had already cost us $21 to get into the fair. So instead, we just walked around and looked at all of the animals and had some yummy fair food! It all smelt SO good and I could have had just about one of everything the vendors were making there. This lion head bunny was the cutest thing there! I could have just cuddled with it all day, just so long as it didn’t bite me, ha! I have a fear of being bit by little animals like that because, dang, it hurts!Ayden was too chicken to pet the pony! They had a little petting zoo type set up and then an animal show. We had gotten seats for the animal show and were all set to watch it and then it started to rain. So instead of sitting in the rain and watching it and getting wet, we got up and went into a building and walked around looking at some more stuff. But this little pony was super cute!And what is a fair without an ELEPHANT EAR! Oh, it was SO yummy and SO worth all of the calories it was filled with! I could probably have eating two! Yes, I ate the whole larger than the plate elephant ear by MYSELF! And Ayden ate an ENTIRE foot long hotdog in a foot long bun! And a little while after the elephant ear, Jay was so kind to ‘share’ his deep friend cookie dough with me. (I mean, it’s not like I ‘demanded’ that he give me some too, even though he hadn’t eaten anything for lunch yet. I would never do such a thing.)And then we saw some beautiful Clydesdale horses! They were SO pretty and SO huge! This horse’s body was taller than me, we are talking body of the body where the saddle would go, taller than me! Now that is a large horse! It was cool to watch them go around the ring though. It was a good way to spend the afternoon and we were all in better moods having gotten out and about for a while.

When we got home, Jay found some little critters in our back yard that he thought would look cool as pictures. One was a spider and the other a nice big bumble bee. I don’t think I’ve gotten so close to either one of these things before, but with my camera in hand, I ‘braved’ it and shot away at both bugs. It was easier to get to the spider because I knew it wasn’t going to go anywhere, but I was a little apprehensive that the bee was going to come flying right at me. I mean, I had to get pretty close and I have this huge aversion to anything that can sting me!I especially like how the bee picture turned out because you can see the hair on the body of the bee and the flower is really pretty!I must admit that I have a small love affair with whom I’m affectionately now referring to as ‘The J’s’. I started working out again on August 8th and since then I have worked out 26 of the 28 days and it’s starting to become a bit of an addiction. Okay, so maybe I wouldn’t say addiction, but I am actually enjoying it. It is still hard for me to get up earlier in the morning and workout then, but by the end of the night I am looking forward to going downstairs and working up a good sweat because I know I will feel good afterwards.

I really enjoyed Jillian Michael’s Ripped in 30 dvd. Even after 26 days of working out, her 20 minute workouts have me dripping sweat afterwards… that (for me) means I’ve done some good work. But I’m getting to the point where I think I need to up the ante and workout for a little while longer.So, I popped in her Banish Fat Boost Metabolism dvd the other day, even though I haven’t quite finished the Ripped in 30 Week 4 and got my sweat on! That dvd says that it is a 40 minute workout, but it is more of a 50 minute workout when you include the warm-up and I don’t even do the stretches afterwards. I made it through the first six (of seven) circuits before I was huffing and puffing too much to push through the last one. And I didn’t even stop! I have to tell you, I felt awesome afterwards!

But alas, I wanted to try something new as well because repetition for me starts to get boring. I looked around at the store and read some reviews online and decided that I was going to try one of Jackie Warner’s workout dvds as well. This is the one that I ended up getting, although I wanted her new timesaver one (the store just didn’t have it and I wasn’t going to order it). I’ve been a fan of hers since seeing her show on Bravo… Workout. She is hardcore trainer.

Unfortunately, this dvd was a little lack luster for me. I did the entire 40 minute total body workout tonight (there is a 40 minute total body workout, 15 minute total body workout, 15 minute upper body workout, 15 minute lower body workout, and 15 minute ab workout). I had tried the 15 minute total body workout yesterday and thought it was okay. I have to say, it’s not that you don’t work your muscles with the 40 minute total body workout (or even the 15 minute one) because you do. I was especially cringing during the ab workout because it hurt, but even after 40 minutes of constantly moving, I wasn’t dripping sweat like I had anticipated.I’m wondering if maybe I need to up the weights that I am using. I am currently using 3 pound weights in each hand and although I am feeling somewhat of a burn, I think my muscles are asking for something a little bit heavier. Personally, I think if you are a beginner and/or looking for something that will help tone you up, this is a good workout. If you workout avidly, then you might not get anything from this. I am going to continue to use it because I know that it will continue to tone me up, but it doesn’t offer the cardio that Jillian does. I think if I alternate between Jillian’s cardio and Jacki’s muscle training I won’t get as bored. I am also going to work in a little bit of what I can do of P90X’s cardio and kenpo.

All in all, like I said before, I might have a tiny love affair with both Jillian and Jacki, hehe! Bring it!

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{love}

I had every intention of blogging about my started out good turned sour turned good day, but my ambition to do that has left.

So bullet points for today it is…

• I worked out this morning instead of at night.
• I also biked 12 miles this afternoon and afterwards the scale read 116.8 pounds!
• I tried a microwaveable pre-cooked Johnsonville brat tonight from the store and it tasted almost as good as the ones done on the grill the day of.
• I had an all out pretty much screaming match with Jay this afternoon. We are all good now.
• I rose my voice more times than I care to admit to Ayden today. Not one of my better parenting days and not one of his better listening days.
• I played with Photoshop instead of writing the blog post I had written in my head all day and created the above picture.
• I love my family more than anything!

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{everday}

I've set a goal for myself to post to my blog every day for the month of September. I haven't been blogging nearly as much as I would like to in these last couple of months and I would like to do it more frequently again... mostly for myself, but you may find some enjoyment in it too. It may be a long post, it may be a short post, it may be just a picture, but I want to do at least one post every day of this month. Wish me luck!

Ayden enjoyed his first 'week' of second grade. His first 'week' consisted of only this Thursday and Friday, but none the less, they were a good two days. He said that they even had a party today for the second day of second grade and got popsicles! Lucky! He has his very own planner that he has to write his homework on everyday and that the parents have to sign. I think it has definitely been a good start to the school year. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for the rest of the year. I won't think about the fact that he will be in the third grade after this school year is over because I thought second grade was too much... third grade is inconceivable right now!

Jay and I talked a little bit more about our future this afternoon as we were waiting for Ayden to get done with school. I think we are both on the concensus that moving back towards our home town is in our best interest. There are pros and cons to not moving back towards that area and pros and cons of moving back towards that area... and it looks like the pros of moving back there weigh out the pros of not and the cons of both. That, and Jay has been having a hard time with his current boss and doesn't know if he wants to continue working there past the winter.

My willpower this week with sweets has been nonexsistent. I've had two bowls of ice cream in as many days. I have trying not to over eat during my meals so that the ice cream would sort of balance it out. The ice cream just kept calling my name though and it was so hard to say no. It is like the best ice cream ever and it is just too bad that I had to give into my seven year old son and buy it at his insistence. Oops, haha! I have been doing good working out though. I am now on Week 4 of Ripped in 30 and pushing through it. Day 3 is tonight! Working out at night seems to work good for me, but I am really going to try and get up earlier in the morning and get my workout in before leaving for class or clinic in the coming weeks. I'll be sure to keep you posted on my progress, whether or not you really want to know.

And that about ends it for my second day of posting this month!

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{different people}

I've struggled to find the words for this post, so bare with me if it seems kind of discombobulated. (P.S. love that word!)

What kind of qualities is a best friend supposed to possess?

Urban dictionary (I know, legit source, right?!) defines a best friend as very special people in your life. The first people you think about when you make plans. The first people you go to when you need someone to talk to. Someone you phone up just to talk about nothing, or the most important things in your life. Someone that tries their hardest to cheer you up when you're sad. Someone who gives the best hugs in the world. They are the shoulder to cry on, because you know that they truly care about you.

I think that is a pretty good summary of what a best friend should encompass. I know that many friendships encompass so much more and many encompass so much less. But we're talking about an honest to god best friend here. Not someone who you occasionally run into while you are out and about.

I'm a relatively private person in real life, unless you really get to know me. Oh, of course here on my blog, ha! Although, I can censor what I put out there for the whole world. (Or the two of you who actually read this.) I don't always go into how I'm truly feeling about something, although a lot of times I do use my blog as a sounding board when I need to vent. I have only a handful of people that I would consider close friends. I have three very close friends who I know I could call up at the drop of a hat with anything and everything. We are a tight knit group of women who have each other’s back no matter what. With these women, I know that we can go days, weeks, even months, without speaking and when we do happen to get back in touch, it’s like we never stopped. What is so great about these women is that is not consistently about them. It is not about how horrible their life is and how things are always going wrong for them. Of course we have our vent sessions, but the friendship is always equal sided.

I’ve struggled in that area with someone who I used to consider my closest friend. We have been friends for as long as I can remember, but our friendship today is no where near what it used to be. Or maybe it is exactly the same and I just refused to see it for what it was all those years ago. Or maybe I was a less selfish person back then?!

I don’t consider myself a selfish person now; however, I am more aware of the people I allow in my life and the impact they have on me. I don’t have the want to expend the emotional effort in making a friendship work when I get little to none in return. It is just not something I am willing to deal with right now. I’m tired of it…

I suppose that only time will tell what happens, where life leads us, and the consequences of it all…

CIAO! LOVE ME!