{busy beavers go go go}

The little man and I were alone for the weekend while Jay was away for some wrestling thing. It was just him and I from Thursday thru Sunday... we did alright, haha! We have a good routine down, just the two of us, so the four days went pretty fast.

Thursday was a typical day at work and school for both of us. We were supposed to get some snow Thursday night, so both of our hopes were up that we would have a stay home day on Friday. Turns out, we did. (Although, if you ask me, all they really needed was a two hour delay.) Because Ayden didn't have school and I wasn't risking the drive to work, I told my dad that Alexis could spend the day at our house and then sleep over night if she wanted. Of course she wanted, so it was the little man, the little lady, and myself from Friday morning through Saturday afternoon. We all had a good time! The kids played good together for most of Friday. We ventured out to Walmart just after lunch and I bought myself a book. I've been dying to read a good book lately, but know that with my busy schedule it would probably be another weeks before I could fit one in, but then decided I needed one right now. You know, just NEEDED one! I haven't read a book in a good couple of months so, one was calling my name. I got the book Safe Haven. I could totally have downloaded it onto my Kindle, but sometimes you just need the feel of a good book in your hands.

I got that book because I want to see the movie and I knew the movie was based off the book and lets be honest here, have you ever read a book and then seen the movie and thought, wow, that movie blew the book out of the water. Um, not so much! At least not me. I always like the book better than the movie. In any case, I finished the book by Sunday. It was a good book and now I can't wait to go see the movie. I gave my mom the book and told her that she had to read it and then we could see the movie together.

I was going to take the kiddos swimming on Friday night; however, because school was cancelled, the pool was not open. They forgave me, we came home and they built a fort in the living room and slept in the fort Friday night. I didn't get to hit up hot yoga on Friday because I had the kids, but I did so some yoga/stretching on Friday morning before Ayden got up and Alexis came over. (Apparently after getting up at 5:45 am for almost a year, your body doesn't like to let you sleep in any later than like 6:30 am.) Anyways, I popped in my Turbo Fire Stretch 40 DVD of which I had tried exactly one time for about 10 minutes when I first got it and then stopped because it was too slow and boring for me and did some yoga. Most of the Turbo Fire moves were ones that I had learned in hot yoga and honestly this time around, I am ready for the slow yoga and stretches. It definitely does a body good. I didn't realize how much good until starting hot yoga. I am hoping that Victoria and I can hit up hot yoga this Friday though.

On Saturday morning I had a photoshoot with two little guys at the house that went very well. Please feel free to hop on over to the photography blog to check out a sneak peak of their session. If you are friends with me on Facebook and/or like my Facebook photography page, Frozen Moments Photography, you may or may not have already seen these. I think they turned out super cute!

The kids behaved really well while I had the photoshoot and afterwards we had lunch and then went bowling. Both Ayden and I had to make up games for league and Alexis likes to bowl too, so we all had a good time. Ayden did pretty good for his scores. He has now started to bowl without bumpers and is doing amazingly well! I love that he found something that he enjoys so much! Me... well I rocked my first game with a score of 158! That is amazeballs for me and I'm not quite sure how I ended up doing so well and then I bombed the next two with more average scores for me... just under 100. Bowling is definitely not my thing as far as doing well in, haha! But we had a good time. After bowling I dropped Alexis off at her house and Ayden and I headed home to chill for a little while.

Originally we had no plans for Saturday night until I saw a friend on Facebook say that she was going to go snowshoeing at a local Nature Center in town Saturday night. I had previously heard about this event from my boss at work but had forgotten about it. I was glad to be reminded (Thanks Sarah!) and asked Ayden if he wanted to go with me. Neither of us had been snow shoeing before and snow shoeing at night sounded fun. Plus, the weather wasn't extremely bitterly cold either. I quickly texted Victoria to see if her and Parker had any plans and whether or not they wanted to join us as well. They did. Have I mentioned how awesome it is that we can just get together at the spur of the moment and have a blast, kiddos included! We had a great time and the kids continued to talk about how much fun they had the day after! It was definitely a good work out, but I'm not going to lie, I was cold and done by the end, haha! There was quite the turnout though, probably 20-30 people. I was expecting much less, but I'm glad there were so many. And Ayden and Parker were not the only kids so that was good too. I was worried that we would be walking too fast for them to keep up, but they were both rock stars!Sunday was mine and Victoria's 5K for February. It went great! My mom came by to watch the little man for me and Victoria and I headed off for our second race together. The weather was semi okay (not super cold, but not super warm either) and we got a really good parking spot. This was the first annual race for this particular 5K, so there were only about 120 runners. The gun went off and and then so were we! Because I've been running inside for the last couple of months, I forgotten how much I enjoy running outside (when it isn't below freezing). The run went smoothly and I had an average pace of about 10 min/mile which was pretty good for me. I was at the finish line cheering Victoria on as she came into finish! She did awesome and beat her time from her last race by over a minute! SO proud of her! Our next race is in a few weeks and I am hoping for a little warmer weather. I am going to attempt the 17K option instead of the 5K option, so that means a few long runs are in my future as preparation. I figure what better to help me prepare for my half marathon in April than a 10 mile run in March!

Here are Victoria and I after the race! Rockstars, yes we were!Here we are post race with the t-shirts that we made to wear. However, we neglected to realize that puffy paint on top of an iron on will not stick, thus some missing letters and us not wearing them. However, I wanted to get a picture of us together with them! And because we are cool (ie: my bestie puts up with me wanting to take crazy pictures with her) here is a picture of us at Parker’s birthday party in matching card glasses and our matching sweatshirts from the race. Stunning, right!The rest of Sunday was spent just chilling out at home with Ayden. And because I am currently obsessed with my arms, here is a picture of my awesome biceps. They are currently my favorite part of my body. They may not be huge (yet), but there is definitely some definition there and I love it! CIAO! LOVE ME!

{perfectly imperfect}

I know I've written a post like the one I am about to write previously... so if you've read my blog for any length of time, you may have already heard this, but I feel the need to write it again...

I've been blogging for almost five years now. I've been journaling for even longer than that. Writing is the easiest way for me to let everything out... the good, the bad, the ugly, the great... all of it. Writing is judgement free in my eyes (even though I'm putting myself out there on the blog now for people to openly judge me, I am thankful that they haven't, at least not to my face). When I journaled, I wrote only for me so I wrote it ALL. Every nitty gritty detail of my screwed up perfectly imperfect life. When I started blogging I used to write it ALL too. Some of my very first posts were very raw and open... probably stuff I wouldn't consider putting on here today. You can go back and reread all of my posts. I haven't gone back and censored anything. I won't. I'll keep it as a record for myself. Actually, one of these wonderful days I'd love to get all of my blog printed out so I have a hard copy of it. I'll get to it, one of these days, haha!

People can and do change with time. I've grown in the last five years. If someone says that they are exactly the same person from five years ago, they are lying. I continue to use my blog as an outlet for me, but I do censor it more than I used to, per Jay's request... and I'm trying to respect that. Also, what I have going on in my life now is drastically different than what I did five years ago (except the whole still being in school part, lol). I've always been a big believe in telling it like it is. I read FAR too many blogs where the author only paints a picture of perfect happiness in his or her life. Only posts the good/happy stuff. Me... I am not that person. If anything, my blog may come off a little more negative than positive because I use it as my outlet. Of course I am going to post good stuff when it happens, but I am also going to post the bad stuff. I strive to be real on my blog. Real.

If that means being elated about a good grade Ayden got or needing to bitch about how crummy my day at work was, I will. If that means posting about how excited I am to run my next race or griping about something crappy Jay did or didn't do that ended up bothering me, I will. It's what I do.

And honestly... if you don't like it, don't read it. I don't write my blog for you or for anyone other than me. I post it online because I can. It is easier (faster) for me to type up a post than to sit and hand write it. Could I type it in a private file just for my eyes only, of course, but I like my blog. I like sharing my perfectly imperfect life. Do I want and or need a million readers, heck no. I doubt I even have 50 consistent people that come back and read my ramblings, but that is okay with me. I know that you will not agree with everything I write... I know that you will not like everything I write... but that's who I am. Take me or leave me...

I know there are blogs that I read that I don't necessarily agree with 100% or like all of the time, but I remind myself that each person is entitled to live their life in his or her own way... JUDGEMENT FREE!!! And I still respect these people. Once again, if you don't like it... don't read it. Easy as that.

I NEVER try to pretend that my life is perfect in any shape or way or form. We all have good days and bad days, I just chose to post it out there for other people to read. It has taken me a LONG time to fully not give a crap what other people think. I just don't give a crap. I don't run with the crowd, I like to run against it... grinning from ear to ear the whole time!

So, will I continue to post about all of the sweet things that Ayden does and all of the moments when he's being a typical little eight year old not listening to his mom... YES! Will I continue to post about personal moments of clarity and craptastic moments when I fall down (only to get back up again)... YES! Will I continue to post about all of the romantic things Jay does for me (probably not, since it never happens anymore, hehe) and the not so romantic pet peeves of his that I dislike... YES! Because that is me, that's what I do.

Will at some point I change what I write or even stop blogging all together... maybe. For the time being, I still enjoy it, so I'll continue it.

Next up, a fun post about mine and the little man's weekend together! It was jam packed full of fun! Stay tuned!

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{pinspiration}

Browsing pinterest lately for some workout inspiration and here are a few that I found that I liked! Enjoy!Heck yeah, I’m awesome! SO awesome!OMG do I believe this! I’ve had numerous friends tell me that they want to work out but they just don’t have the time. BULLSHIT is right! If my bestie who works full time, goes to school full time, and raises her son along can workout, then ANYONE can make the time! Way to go Victoria!Working out is such a mental thing at times! MANY times, haha! Just need to push past the mental block of the ‘I cant’s’ and ‘just do’s’. Which is totally me right now!

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{out of my mind}

I may have pounded out five miles on the treadmill last night, but they definitely weren't enjoyable miles and it was one of the few workouts where I've left in a worse mood coming in. The fact that I forgot my headphones/iPod definitely played into that worse mood as I was left alone with my thoughts for an hour. Nothing but me and the pounding of my feet on the treadmill belt in a gym full of people... despite being surrounded by a ton of people (which by the way becomes easier and easier every day), I felt like I was completely alone. Typically I have my headphones along and I can plug into the treadmill and watch one of the many TVs that are hanging from the ceiling, but yesterday I forgot. So, no TV, no music, just my ever thought processing brain.

It's like yesterday life after graduation suddenly became real. Each day graduation becomes one day closer and you cannot begin to imagine how excited I am about that. I have worked my ass off these last nine years and cannot wait to be Dr. Ashley. But honestly, as excited as I am, that thought also scares the crap out of me sometimes. I've been living in the 'real' world for the last nine years... living on my own (on my own an hour and a half from family), making things work with Jay (which has been mostly good), raising the world's most wonderful little man, paying bills, and going to school. Yes, I've had to worry about money to a certain extent... it's not as if we've ever asked for money from family because we haven't. I don't know why I keep thinking that the actual real world is going to be so much different than what it is now. I suppose though that the ever looming student loan debt that we have is what freaks the living daylights out of me and it shouldn't.

Yesterday was a day of really realizing that the 'end' is near. I got an email saying that graduation is going to be inside. Big bummer! (Although at least if the weather is craptastic this year, no one will be freezing.) Graduation for the doctoral candidates (me) isn't until the afternoon. Bummer again (mostly because I wanted it in the morning), and we only get six tickets. Not that I wanted every person in my family there... I don't know. It just really made me bug out and disappointed.

On top of that I found out about a job offer about an hour away. I know it would be an awesome job, but here's the thing... it is an hour away from where we currently live. Getting this job would mean moving because I really don't want to be driving an hour to work each day (especially with another Wisconsin winter like this... 45 minutes is enough and when I actually do get a job, I'll have to try a little harder at making it there when they are my patients and no one else can see them, ie: right now my supervisor sees them... that and the fact that she only lives five minutes from the office makes her drive a little easier to manage). A potential move could mean cutting Jay's drive down to next to nothing which would be awesome for him. But here's the thing, I don't want to move. It took me a long time to stop missing Point and feeling like that was home for me, but now I feel at home again in Chilton. And as small as the city is, as much as I hate not having my stores near by, the fact that our family is SO much closer has been the biggest blessing of everything. Although I don't see us living at our current residence forever, I was hoping we'd be here for at least two or three years and then be able to buy a house and really settle down. Moving would be changing Ayden's schools... again! I really DREAD doing that. At what point do I put getting a job over pulling my son from a school that he is just getting settled in to only have to transfer him again? My thoughts... never.

Now, I know that said potential job is most likely not the only job out there that I would be a fit for, but it has opened my eyes to what is coming in the next couple of months.

All of these obscene thoughts were running through my head on my run last night and I desperately wanted to give up at mile three, but I kept pushing. Last night was definitely more mental than physical. It sucked. I was in a pretty foul mood when I got home and really just wanted to veg, but Jay and I ended up talking and he seemed to ease my fears a little bit. I'm still worried, but I know that with him by my side we will work through whatever may come up. He has a good stable job right now with prospects of it continuing to grow in the future, so if I can find a good job that lets us stay in the area we will push through. We will never be rich, but that was never the point. I'd just love to be able to not have to count pennies out of the couch (not that we were ever at that point) and I think we will be well on our way to that in the coming years. I have faith.... we have faith.

And now that Ayden and I are stuck home for the day because of bad weather, I need to keep motivated before my mood sours again. I only had a half day of work scheduled for today and had grand plans of running some errands afterwards and hitting up the gym and getting home a little earlier than normal. Stupid mother nature decided I shouldn't do that today, rained out last night, froze the rain on the roads, and then snowed on top of that. A two hour delay for the little man meant I could still hit up work for a bit and do my errands, but that turned into no school because it's still snowing, no work, no errands, lets relax at home. Might just have to hit up my dad's treadmill tonight instead. And the errands will have to wait until next week I suppose. They are nothing important anyways. But seriously mother nature, we are broaching the end of February, you can give up anytime now... anytime!

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{truckin' along}

In my world, it is Wednesday. I am already ready for the week to be over. Is that sad? It hasn't been a bad week by any means, I'm just ready for it to be done. I am looking forward to the weekend, a relaxing weekend at home with the little man, well, I might get out and go shopping on Sunday. We shall see.

I busted my booty at the gym on Monday and rocked out six miles on the treadmill. I was so ready to bust out eight miles, but I just couldn't make it. I lie. I could have made it, but I stopped. I wimped out. I had sweat pouring off of me and I just wanted to get home, so I stopped at six. But six is a great in my books.

Another night at the gym on par for today, but I'm not shooting for any record breaking runs. Want to bust out about three miles in thirty minutes. That is faster than I have been running lately, so it is going to be a little bit of a push, but that is my goal. I also plan on hitting up the elliptical for a little bit after that too. The elliptical is much harder for me because I haven't been using it lately. Then I am going to go home, relax, and hopefully watch a new episode of Criminal Minds all cozy in bed. I don't even know if it is new tonight, I just hope so, haha!

Craptastic eating lately. That is pretty much all I have to say about that. It just so happens to be that time of the month, so cut me some slack, haha! At least I am going to the gym tonight, that should count for something. And I have plans to go to the gym tomorrow night and hit up some hot yoga on Friday... plus adding in all of my push-ups, sit-ups, squats, and planks that I have been doing each night. So glad to say that I have been staying on top of those even when I don't want to. Gearing up for March because that month is bound to be harder... bring it on biotch, haha!

I wish I had more exciting news to offer up with this post, but I don't. To be honest, life continues on like normal lately. Going to work and coming home. Dealing with the cold snowy weather and still hating it. Working out. Doing homework every now and then. I would definitely love to start a new book (thinking Safe Haven). Thinking maybe that will be a this weekend thing. I need the good escape from the real world that a good book gives me and the movie looks like it is going to be good, so that means the book must be better, right?!

Valentine's Day is tomorrow. Enough said about that too. Haha!

More later when I have something interesting to post about.

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{not THAT weekend}

Either Jay read my blog (which I highly doubt, but wouldn't totally cross it off because I know he has in the past), or he's not as much of a self absorbed ass (totally kidding, he's not) party/drinker as I thought he would be because he didn't actually stay out very late any of the nights this weekend. Maybe he is just getting old and can't handle it anymore, haha!

After shopping with my mom on Saturday afternoon, Ayden and I headed over to Victoria's house for supper and dominos. She had her brother and sister over and knew that Ayden and I had nothing going on, so she invited us along as well. It works great because she lives just across town! Also, her nephew is in Ayden's class so I knew that he would have fun playing with the kids and I could get some adult time. Plus, Jay wasn't at home, nor did I expect him home at any reasonable time. Turned out, just as Ayden and I were leaving Victoria's, Jay called me and said that they were home (at the super late hour of 8:30pm) and that they were going to go bowling. The boys, Jay, JT, Ayden, and Jay's brother ended up going bowling with my brother and two of his friends. Me, I stayed home, went to bed and relaxed.

Sunday was more alone time while the guys went out fishing in the morning. Victoria and Parker stopped over to make some shirts for our next run together. I am super excited about that and the shirts turned out awesome! They are currently still drying on my office room floor. I fully expected that Jay and JT would not get home until late on Sunday night because neither of them had to work on Monday; however, I was wrong. Despite the fact that fishing was over at noon, they still made it home at the reasonable time of 4pm. Before calling it a night, JT wanted to check out a bowling ball pro shopping in Appleton and because they were conveniently headed to a bowling alley, why not play a few games. I wasn't going to go along, but I knew they would be gone for supper, which meant that they would be going out to eat, and I didn't feel like cooking for myself at home, so I joined them. The guys and the little man played three games of bowling, while I sat and watched and then we all went to Hu Hot for supper. It was SO yummy and I restrained myself from getting a second plate. It was after 8pm by the time we got home and Ayden and I were drained so we headed right to bed and both of us slept great. I know that Jay joined me shortly after we got home and I'm thinking JT fell asleep soon there after too as none of us made it through the 9pm show we were watching, haha!

Jay and JT went fishing again this morning and Ayden had a two hour delay because of icy road conditions. Me... I headed into work on time. I left work early last Thursday because of the weather and stayed home Friday because of shitty roads, but I chanced it today and was glad that I did because even though our driveway is glare ice, the roads were okay driving in. Definitely not perfect, but driveable... even for me, haha! My dad has off for the week, so Jay was able to drop Ayden off at his house before he headed out for fishing and my dad dropped Ayden off at school with Alexis. JT leaves today and may or may not be joining us again next weekend for some more fishing. We shall see...

Ayden and I don't have too many plans for next weekend right now and I'm kind of looking forward to it. Despite enjoying this weekend and adding in things to keep myself busy while Jay was busy, I didn't get a lot of relaxing down time and I am kind of looking forward to that. Little man will have bowling on Saturday morning, but that is it. Jay and I are supposed to bowl on Saturday night; however, he will be gone for a wrestling tournament. I am SO looking forward to the end of that because I feel like I have been way more than supportive of him being gone. He made the comment to me that his mom has dealt with it for however many years that his dad has been a coach, but I reminded him that his mom doesn't have any kids at home so that when his dad is gone, she gets alone time. I don't get alone time, I get to be the single mommy and doing everything. Not that taking care of my 8 1/2 year old child is in any way shape or form THAT hard, but he's gone getting to do something he enjoys and he's not getting paid for it. If he were getting paid, it'd be a different story, but he's not. In any case, I'm so over the wrestling season and unfortunately, just as it ends, Jay will most likely have to start working overtime again and although he'll get paid for that, he is even more tired and even less help around the house. Speaking of him being gone all day Saturday, he will also be gone all day tomorrow at a tournament, not getting home until midnight or later most likely. Oh well, I need to stop complaining, haha! (Like that is ever going to happen!)

And, should JT join us next weekend, Jay will be gone all day Sunday too. Wait, you haven't heard about the following two weekends either... because the weekend after next is state wrestling which means Jay is gone from Thursday through Sunday, and then the weekend after that is team state wrestling and should the team win tomorrow night, they will be going there which means another Saturday down the shit hole. And if it isn't team state, it is the little kids wrestling tournament in town that he will be at. Yes, I'm just about bitter now. So we are talking halfway into March before I get a weekend home alone with my honey with no plans. I think that calls for an almost bitter moment.

On the fitness band wagon... I have not worked out since Thursday at hot yoga. Oops. Well, I take that back because I have been doing my February challenge with Victoria, but that is not sweat inducing working out. I have already made up a March challenge for us! That is the one thing that I have been able to stay on top of. I am ready to hit the gym tonight and get in a good run on the treadmill. Cannot wait. I hoping for a good long run because my legs need it. My half is slowly going to creep up on me in April and I am not going to be ready for it. I need to kick my butt into training mode again. I am totally able to run four or five miles pretty easily, but isn't going to get me to finish the race! Time to kick it into gear! Push out those extra miles! And it starts today. It definitely sucks with the weather that we have been having because I haven't been able to get in my good outdoor long runs. I am hoping that we start to warm up a little bit here in February (oh, who am I kidding, we've gotten two huge snow storms in just the last two weeks alone) and then into March and April I can really get back into my outdoor training!

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{THAT weekend}

Can I just start this post out with how much I am hating winter right now. These past two weeks have been shit for driving to and from work and I'm just plain sick of it. As I sit looking out the window right now the frost on the trees is beautiful... almost beautiful enough for me to want to get my camera out and capture some of it, but not quite. It's cold out and I'm not very happy with mother nature right now, no matter how pretty she may make the trees, haha!

Now that I've got my gripe about the weather off my chest, I have to say the week ended up pretty good. I worked out at the gym twice. I know, only twice isn't a lot, but the other days didn't work. I worked out there on Monday and Tuesday... Wednesday is my typical day to pick the little man up from my dad's house, I had plans on working out there on Thursday, but the weather turned icky in the afternoon, so I didn't, and Friday I didn't go into work because of shit ass roads. That and Ayden had a two hour delay, so I wouldn't have gotten there until almost 11am and the afternoon schedule included two patients, so I didn't think it was worth the gas or torture of attempting the somewhat okay roads at that point. If I was getting paid and/or these were my actual patients, then I probably would have made more of an effort; however, I'm not getting paid (yet), and my supervisor was there to see the patients. I do not believe in putting my safety at risk for just a few patients. If that makes me selfish and a wimp for not driving in crappy weather, so be it. I will openly admit that I am a wimp in crappy weather.

Despite not getting to the gym on Thursday, Victoria and I did hit up hot yoga. If not for her offering to drive, I would not have gone. It is only six miles away, but the six mile stretch that leads us there is the crappiest stretch of road. Victoria has a truck and is much more comfortable having to drive in the snow than I am (probably because for the last seven years my winter driving has consisted of going a mile across town and back, not 45 minutes away). Hot yoga was just what I needed. Warm room and a good workout.

Jay's friend, JT, is visiting this weekend for sturgeon spearing. He ventured over from Minnesota in the craptastic weather on Thursday night and is chillin' at our place until Monday night. If I haven't mentioned it before, Jay and JT met at work in Stevens Point shortly after we moved up there and they have been inseperable since, even after JT moved back to Minnesota a few years after they met. JT is actually going to be Jay's best man in the wedding.

However, when JT is here, I tend to take a back seat to Jay. I thoroughly understand that they get to see each other in person a few times a year, but it bums me out that when JT is around, I'm all but nonexsistent. Now, I love JT like family. He is a great guy, great with Ayden, and great for Jay. He's been a part of our family for the last seven years. (It helps that he volunteeringly scraped the snow off my car yesterday, hehe!) Anyways, back to this weekend... sturgeon spearing. I have no interest in it whatsoever, so for Jay to have someone to do it with is great.

But this is how my weekend is going to go... Thursday night when JT got here, him and Jay headed out the door to do some stuff for sturgeon spearing and then went bowling until midnight, yesterday after work Jay headed out on the lake to help cut holes, got home in time to eat supper and then for us (meaning me, him, JT, my brother, sister, and sister's boyfriend) to head out to see Jeff Dunham. Great fantastic show, so glad we went, but felt more like a third wheel. Today, Jay is gone all day at a wrestling tournament, after which is finished he will no doubt head down to the lake/bar and spend the rest of the day getting drunk off his ass and getting home well after midnight, with a repeat tomorrow, and at least half of Monday (although I doubt Monday will include much drinking as he has to work on Tuesday). If it sounds like I am bitter about this plan, that is because I kind of am. I am trying my best to not let it show as I don't want to ruin any time that JT has here. I know that Jay has EVERY right to go out and have fun without me.

I think another part that just plain out irritates me is that he'll be out drinking/getting drunk. I don't drink (and when I do, it's typically only in the summer when we are camping and its definitely not to get drunk). I feel like in instances like this, a different Jay comes out and I fear that maybe its the Jay he actually wants to be, but isn't because of me. When in Point he never went out to drink at the bars (mostly because he didn't have anyone to go with) and since moving back 'home' it's been a lot more often and honestly, I HATE it every time he does it. Sometimes I wish he didn't drink like me because then I wouldn't feel like maybe I'm holding him back from the person he really wants to be. So, although I want him to have a good time out this weekend with his friend, and I want them to get a sturgeon, a large part of me is trying to quelch down all of these negative feelings.

I'll just keep my pretty little mouth shut for now and try to make the best of my weekend which includes taking little man to bowling, running a few errands, going shopping with my mom, and hanging out with Victoria and Parker tomorrow afternoon making some shirts. I purposely tried to pack a bunch in this weekend because I didn't want to sit home bored and stewing. So, while Jay is out having fun without me, not giving me or Ayden a second thought, we'll go out and have fun without him...

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{life via instagram}

I thought it was time to share some pictures again, since it has been a while since I've done a picture post. I haven't gotten my 'good' camera out in quite a while and tend to use the camera on my phone quite a bit and document my life via instagram a lot. Because I am not using my laptop to blog and typically use just the tablet these days, adding pictures becomes somewhat of a chore... so therefor now I am adding some pictures for you of what life has been like around here lately. Okay I lie, they are mostly just pictures of me because I am a picture hog, lol!

To start the lovely picture journey... here is a selfie + almost hubby picture... ain't we one cute looking couple?! And the almost hubby has an actual smile on his face and not a fake get away from me one or a scowl. Must have caught him in a good mood that day.Next... how about a selfie + bestie picture. Notice a theme yet... I love scarves! I wear a scarf almost EVERY day these days and I love it. The bestie in this picture (as if you didn't already know and/or couldn't already guess because her name appears in almost every blog post these days) is Victoria and we are wearing our matching hats that my amazeballs crocheting cousin Amanda made for us. Super cute, right?! Yeah, that is what I thought. I meant the hats, not the girls, lol, okay, maybe I meant both!If we continue on with this lovely picture journey, it's another almost selfie as my face doesn't make an appearance in this picture, but my awesome 'guns' do. Oh how I am loving the effect dreaded push-ups are having on my biceps. I thought my arms were looking good back in September... September didn't have nothing on these! That there my friends is some serious definition going on (at least for me)! LOVE it! Hate push ups, but LOVIN' the arms! Just more motivation to keep it up, that is for sure!Just a regular selfie in the bathroom mirror here, but I was liking how I looked that day. On days I think I look good I take pictures of myself, lol! And... another scarf! I seriously love this scarf and am SO glad that I decided to get it. Have I perfected the picture in the mirror pose yet?!No, not yet?! Mm'kay... let's try again! Here is a full body shot in the mirror on another feelin' good day. This was a feel good day because those purple skinny jeans, they are a size 5 my friends, a size 5. These child bearing hips fit into a size 5 and comfortable, no muffin top allowed. Plus, donnin' another cool looking scarf like non other. This girl can pull of a scarf! Lol! If you haven't already noticed, I am in a wacked up crazy mood and normally am not so all about me. (Well maybe I am, but please don't actually tell me that to my face, haha!)Still kickin' it on the workout train these days! May not be every day, but I'm doing pretty well. Running on the treadmill is definitely not the most fun thing in the world, but when it comes down to that because of the crappy snowy cold ass weather we have been having, a little Beverly Hills 90210 helps make the time pass a little bit faster.And last but not least, what post would be complete without some love from the little man! Isn't he just a doll?! Love him to death, especially when he enjoys being in pictures with me!A 'real' post coming soon!

CIAO! LOVE ME!

{hot yoga, swimming, and bestie date}

The rest of my week went rather well. Clinic went smoothly and I was looking forward to the weekend, well, I mean, who doesn't look forward to the weekend?!?! I got a good four mile run in on Thursday night.

Friday night was pretty busy.

Got done with work and headed home. I had good intentions of heading to hot yoga with Victoria. I got home just in time to quickly change, shoot on over to Victoria's place to pick her up and get back to the place where hot yoga was going to happen. Neither Vic nor I had done yoga before (other than me trying it on a workout DVD once and giving up after about 5 minutes because it was SO boring). We both had kind of googled hot yoga beforehand so we kind of knew what we were getting ourselves into. What we were both looking forward to the most was the hot room. The weather has been so cold, so anything warm is up my alley!

The instructor of the class (and all of the other particpants) were SO welcoming! It was the most relaxing, yet booty kicking, thing I've ever done workout wise! I don't know if it was the setting, the warm room, the instructor, or my mind set, but this was SO much better than when I had tried it at home. It really was about me and not being perfect. I walked out of there feeling SO relaxed and at peace. This is definitely something I will be going back to again! I'd love to make it a Friday night routine as at the end of the week it is something that I really need. Although, since this Friday night we have something going on, I might have to hit it up on Thursday night.

After yoga, I zoomed home to pick up Alexis and Ayden and take them swimming. We swam (in cold water, I wish they would warm the pool water up some) for about 45 minutes and then headed home. That was the extent of my night, but Ayden, Jay, and my brother, Casey, went bowling after that. Me, I zonked out in bed!

Yesterday, Ayden had bowling in the morning, of which he did pretty well. We kind of chilled for the rest of the day and then Jay and I had bowling at night. I was SO not in the mood to go and was really being a bitch about having to go, but (and I hate to admit this) I did end up having more than a halfway decent time. Haha! Don't tell Jay! No working out yesterday and ate like crap, but that's okay sometimes! I just need to work on that.

Today... no big working out today, but I did get my 25's in (twice to make up for totally skipping on it yesterday). And if your not Vic, you probably won't understand that. Sorry! I think I mentioned that we are doing a challenge through February with doing 25 sit ups, push ups, and squats and increasing slightly each week.

We did do some grocery shopping today and did menu plan for the second week in a row. We ran into just about everyone we knew while shopping this morning. It was rather amusing. The joys of living in a small town, right?! Then I met up with Vic for a bestie gab session. We met at a local coffee shop and chatted for about an hour. Then since the shop was about to close we headed to Walmart to pick out our stuff for our custom shirts for our next race. I can't wait because we have an awesome idea for both us and and our kiddos!

I'll have to do a picture post soon!

CIAO! LOVE ME!