Stagnant

I don't feel like I've made any progress on my weight loss goals this week. I weighed myself last Sunday morning and I weighed 126lbs (OMG... yes I am putting my weight out there, I don't care anymore) which is not the lowest I've been since I started this whole 'journey'. I started at 133lbs and at one point I was down to 124lbs (for only a day). I don't know if it was scale error that day or what (although I weighed myself numerous times to make sure the number I saw was actually right and it stayed the same like three or four times), but the next day I was back up to 126 lbs. Who knows...

Anyways, I didn't want to weigh myself again until this coming Sunday morning, but I caved and weighed myself Thursday morning after breakfast and with my clothes on... scale verdict was 128lbs. So, I'm assuming my actual morning weight was 126lbs sans clothes. Boo, I wanted it to be lower. However, I haven't been as diligent with going for bike rides this week and eating like I have been. I am trying to stick to 1200 calories per day with at least two bottles of water (which equates to about 4 of the 8 cups they say you should drink each day, but have you actually ever tried to drink 8 cups of water per day, thats a lot and even with 4 cups of whatever I'm peeing almost three times as much as I was before!) So, without any snacks and being good, I've been able to stay at least 200-300 calories below the 1200 most days. (I have this wonderful calorie counter on my phone!) But this week I caved the last two nights. Jay made some ultimate chocolate brownies and I just couldn't let them sit there. Do you really know how small a two inch square brownie is?! Like less than half the size I'm used to! It doesn't sound small, but it is! Well, one small bite of chocolate is NOT enough and I HAD to have two brownies... TWO nights this week! UGH! I do have to say that even with two brownies on Wednesday night, I was still under my 1200 calories for the day by like 100, but last night I went over by about 40. Oops! And this morning I discovered why my chocolate craving was so darn high these last two days... that'll explain it, ha!

I SO want to continue on this path, but some part of me just wants to be gluttonous one day and pig out again and not worry. I know I shouldn't worry so much about the number of calories I'm ingesting, but what I'm actually ingesting itself. My goal weight is 115lbs by the end of May... just before summer... That is plenty of time because they say that a one to two pound loss per week is healthy. But, its getting towards the end of the semester and I just seem to be getting busier and busier and more and more stressed out. And I'm sure that's not exactly conducive to healthy weight loss.

Anyways... this weekend is supposed to be Ayden's first soccer game of the spring. It looks like it just might get rained/sleeted/snowed out. Boo because the seasons is only seven weeks long and he only plays on Saturdays and I paid $35 for it and he'll be missing a different Saturday because he's going home with Jay that weekend! I totally want to get my money's worth out of it! Oh well... that just means I get to sleep in this Saturday! I got to sleep in until 7:45am this morning. That was pretty nice! I have been SO tired lately... going to be around 9pm! Although, I do have to say that I haven't been as tired in the morning when I go to bed that early which is good.

I'm currently reading the book Water for Elephants. The movie previews for it look really good and when I found out it was a book, I just had to have it... you book lovers know how it is. Besides, the books are ALWAYS better than the movies, trust me on that one!!! I could have easily ordered it on my Kindle, but I was at a point where I wanted an actual book in my hands to read. My fellow e-reader reader's, do you ever get that feeling?! I love my Kindle to death, but the feel of a good solid book in your hands never gets old either and sometimes I just need that feeling. The book itself a little more expensive than it would have been for the Kindle, but oh well. Actually, I made Jay go buy it for me yesterday while I was at clinic. I also made him get the Wii game Just Dance 2 for me. I had read good reviews about it, and it looked like lots of fun. Jay and Ayden wanted me to play it last night, but I didn't want them laughing at me and said I wouldn't play it in front of them, mostly just Jay because I knew he would just sit back on the couch and laugh because I was doing it wrong. I'm a geek like that and can't take him laughing at me. You'd think after being together for so long it wouldn't matter and for the most part it doesn't, but I need to play the game myself alone and get the hang of it before I let anyone else see me. Now, if I were with my friends and they were trying it for the first time with me, that's a whole other story. The thing is, I know that Jay will probably NEVER play the game because he's just like that. We traded in a bunch of our other Wii games that we no longer play for this one and another game for Jay's Xbox.

I’m trying to hang in for another couple of weeks… almost summer time!

CIAO! LOVE ME!