Blindsided!

I meant to post this weekend, I really did... trust me, however I didn't get around to it and then when I did finally have the time I was most certainly not in the mood to write. However before my lackage of writing happened last night, we had a pretty gosh darn good weekend!

Our drive home on Friday was fabulous... and that is because I drove, lol! I don't mind all that much driving Jay's truck and every now and then I actually even enjoy it just a bit. But don't tell him that! Anyways, practically the whole drive to Appleton there was this car who we termed a 'hoverer' (is that a word, well it is now). This car would go the same speed as me if I was going 70 or 76... seriously, once I even slowed down to almost 65 and we still couldn't lose it. It was kind of getting funny to see how they would get ahead of us and then always end up stuck back behind us farther ahead. Anyways, we get to Appleton and the car is just about to exit and wouldn't you know, we knew the driver. It was one of Ayden's old daycare teachers! It was so funny that this person who we were getting 'frustrated' with was actually someone we knew. It would be just like that to happen to us, lol!

We stopped at Jay's grandparent's house for a fish fry supper. It was some Alaskan halabit and it was pretty good. Ayden even enjoyed it! We visited for a while because Jay's aunt (from Iowa who we've seen twice in the past month, yeah us!) was home taking care of his grandma who is recovering from hip surgery. She got a new hip and is doing quite well already. She was up and moving around a bit when we were there. So, we got to visit with them for a while and then headed to Jay's parent's around bedtime for Ayden.

That pretty much constituted our Friday night, but it was nice and relaxing for us. Saturday morning Ayden got up really early and neglected to wake me up as asked. I'm guessing he was up around 5:30 because Jay said that he was up even before Jay got up at 6. I had told Ayden to wake me up when he got up because I was anticipating that it would be later and that no one would be home (they were all going to the little kids wrestling tournament). Jay decided that since his brother wasn't leaving early that he could watch Ayden and let me sleep in. Ayden decided that it was time for me to wake up at about 7:30. It was nice to sleep in a little bit because I don't know if I could have handled a 5:30 wake up call on a Saturday.

Most of Saturday was spent at my mom's house with my sister. We chilled out there and had some yummy ice cream cake! It was nice just to be able to sit with them and talk. We always have so much to talk about when we get together. I definitely appreciate the time that we get to spend together! And my sister and I get along so much better now than we did when we were younger. My brother even stopped over for a little while which was nice, but I think he just wanted the food. Lol... boys!

I think we ended up leaving around 5:30ish to come back to Point. We didn't want to get stuck in the bad weather on Sunday (and ugh did we get snow here!) and our drive back was pretty uneventful. This time Jay drove...

I had told Ayden that on the way home we could stop at Quik Trip and get him some corn dogs and Bug Juice (kind of becoming a tradition for us), however he fell asleep very quickly into our drive and Jay and I decided to let him sleep because he was really tired. I knew that we had a corn dog left at home and I could make him that one when we got home. So I put the corndog in the toaster oven... on a heat that was much too high and practically burnt the whole outside of it before realizing it. It's a good thing that we have a Quik Trip not even a block away from our apartments because I was out the door getting Ayden some after that. Lol! And he ate both of the corn dogs, and they weren't exactly little either. He must have been really starving!

For most of the day yesterday we lounged around the house. I was having a hard time really tired to get motivated to do anything. I didn't have anything that I should have been studying for, but definitely could have been reading some of my text books. I did some laundry (which has yet to be folded) and cleaned a little bit. The snow started and then Jay had to go out to work by like 7pm.

So on to the whole being blindsided thing... OMG... totally didn't see it coming. I'm not comfortable going into mega details just yet, but suffice to say that you really never truly know someone. I mean, I thought I knew this person, thought I had them figured out, but wouldn't you know that they did the one thing that could hurt me... the one thing they said over and over that I would never have to worry about. But what makes me so upset is the fact that I let it hurt me so much. I should know better than to let someone get to me that bad. I've been thinking about this situation for a while now (most of last night because I couldn't sleep) and think I have a solution. A solution that will make niether of us happy in the beginning, but one that I think we need to have in order for our lives to go on without this hanging in the middle of us. I talking about taking a step back from this friendship between my friend and I and going our separte ways for a while. I don't think that they will agree, but they need to see that this is what I need for me right now. It's not something that I want to do, but something that I think I need to do. We are in two very different places in our lives and need to concentrate on those paths seperately. I don't know what else to do. I've thought about it over and over. And I definitely know that this could back fire on me and make me miss the friendship even more, but it something that I have to at least try. I hope I am making the right choice here. It's about time I make a choice...

Okay... I am at the clinic right now and have a couple of minutes to start my reflection from my therapy session today so that is precisely what I am going to do...

CIAO! LOVE ME!